Note: This story is a special contribution from Nugable.  Go to his website for hilarious, insightful and honest surfing revelations.

Maybe it’s the White Russian I’m drinking or the little round peanuts I’m eating. They’re looking at me like I have all the answers, but I can’t focus. And I have no answers. The peanuts are wrong. Those bastards are seldom right. I can’t focus on the choppy walls at Snapper Rock on my computer screen. I’m seeing double. Or am I? I can’t determine if it’s the vodka or the chop on the ocean or if Mother Nature got fed up with Dane testing her authority. She is an unruly bitch, that Mother Nature, and not even Ike Turner is big enough or bad enough to smack her down when she acts up.

The King of Big Wave Surfing Laird Hamilton joined Cyrus & Omar on November 22nd, 2008 about his new book, why he doesn't compete, and his pet pigs.

Outside Magazine is a mixed bag of outdoorsiness and yuppiness, all packaged in a publication aimed for middle-aged men trying to hold on to whatever remnants of youth they still encompass. I don’t want to completely bag on them – their writers do produce quality content from time to time, and fans of Jon Krakauer will forever owe their gratitude for exposing the talent behind the writer. Unfortunately, they miss the mark nine times out of ten, and that one time when they do come up with something worthwhile, it never involves surfing. Case in point: Their selection of Tofino, British Columbia as “The best surf town in North America.”

Note: This story is a special contribution from Nugable.  Go to his website for hilarious, insightful and honest surfing revelations.

The first event of the WCT season is crucial to world title aspirations. A good start on the Gold Coast can slingshot you into world title contention. A bad result can affect your entire year. A perfect example is Kelly Slater’s early exit last year at Snapper. He seemingly never recovered. Since 2005 only 14 surfers have won a WCT event. Just 14. Can you believe that? If that doesn’t prove how difficult winning a ’CT event is, I don’t know what does.

Our boy Bron Heussenstamm brings it creepy-style from ASR with his second video installment for Sanuk (hey Sanuk, it's been six months - where the f*ck are my kicks?).  Bron has no sponsor, is 30 and out of shape.  Can he make a comeback?

See the hilarious video after the jump.

Stab Magazine, the Australian surf publication who has built a rather large readership over the years due to their immensely popular website, usually hits the mark with their witty commentary on professional surfing and the surf industry. However, their recent story on Jamaican pro surfer Icah Wilmot may have crossed the line of racism.

Bobby Martinez is no stranger to controversy.  In the last two years, Martinez first left his surfboard sponsor Channel Islands because of what he called “equipment needs” (more on that below), then left his clothing sponsor, Reef, citing a lack of support and poor treatment.  While Martinez called his split with Channel Islands amicable, he made no secret that he was extremely unhappy with the way Reef treated him, to the point where Martinez left his contract with two years remaining.  Martinez now has a new clothing sponsor, recently signing with O’Neill, and says he’s very happy with his new surfboard sponsor, DHD.  There remains plenty that Martinez is unhappy about, and he revealed these things in a very candid fashion with ESPN’s sh*tty surfing website.

Note: This story is a special contribution from Nugable.  Go to his website for hilarious, insightful and honest surfing revelations.

Scapegoat \ˈskāp-ˌgōt\ noun
a: one that bears the blame for others
b: one that is the object of irrational hostility.     

In sports, a judge, official or referee is a thankless job.     

The theme of this past year, since I began my stint as an unemployed traveler and freelance journalist, has been road trips. Following The Great KL&C Northwest Odyssey, the winds of adventure this time were blowing south, leading me to the great and vast southern extension of California that is Baja.

Note: This story is a special contribution from Nugable.  Go to his website for hilarious, insightful and honest surfing revelations.

5. The Recession
Budgets were cut. Surfers were dropped. Employees were sent packing. Stock prices tanked. Brands went out of business. No one was safe from the 2009 Velcro Valley Chainsaw Massacre. In 2010 surf company executives won’t be counting barrels in Tavarua. They’ll be counting their fingers hoping whoever they borrowed from to keep afloat doesn’t come looking to collect. Some say the worst is over. If the fat lady is singing, she’s a little off key at the moment.