Ok, so I may have gotten a little delinquent on my weekly post.  Yes Teabag Tuesday should have come out on Tuesday.  That's pretty obvy by just the name.  Did I deserve a special addition Teabag Thursday post....? Most definitely.  Somebody has to keep my ass in line and who better to do that, than my hate-inspiring bros... My only concern here is that Cyrus has a photo of my balls and edited that into the picture!  I suppose at the end of the day though, I would prefer my own balls if I have to be TB'd.  At least I know where they've been....

In my defense I did want to know a bit more about his departure and the whole Surfline vs. Lewis Samuels controversy before I started what will inevitably turn into a full blown shit storm bro-tastrophy.  Besides Lewis is joining us on the show this week, so I felt compelled to perform my own version of in-depth investigative journalism.

I've found that a real show of character is what people will say when their angry.  Sometimes saying less is more and saying anything at all is too much. In this case Surfline said too much in defending why they let contributing writer Lewis Samuels go.

Now it's not really my business why Surfline decided to let surf writer Lewis Samuels go.  Sure, I have theories as to what the beef was based on. I'm guessing Surfline's typically mind numbing content and corporate ball cupping as opposed to Lewis Samuels tell it like it is style of writing simply collided on a philosophical level. Lewis is a funny, provocative no-holds-barred, writer who gives a fresh un-filtered perspective on surfing and the surf industry. Surfline is basically a corporate whore whose puppet strings are pulled by the corporate puppet masters. Typically this would resonate only in my clogged gray matter and you would be free from hearing my possibly biased opinion.  The issue here is that Surfline felt compelled to issue a 'justification' for Lewis' departure.

To paraphrase, the statement read like this. Lewis wrote for us for 2 years, his writing was often inflammatory, he started his own blog, we supported him with a link to his site, his writing didn't meet the journalistic standards we here at Surfline adhere to (didn't realize they had any), he published allegedly false statements (although these were not mentioned specifically), he was damaging to our 'reputation' and we thought we could do better and finally the obligatory Lewis Samuel is a great guy best of luck.

Now I know you're all asking what's wrong with Surfline's statement. First of all, as a company, issuing ANY statement is tantamount to admission of guilt or some impropriety.  Second, you need to be able to read between the lines to hear what they really said.

TRANSLATION: Lewis barely worked two years for us so his departure shouldn't be that big of deal, we're Surfline and we gave a nobody the opportunity to write for our prestigious site and he wrote things that pissed off our corporate sponsors.  To make matters worse, he had the audacity to start his own surf blog and started dipping into our page views.  His writing was ruthlessly truthful, but because of his affiliation with Surfline our corporate sponsors (Billabong) got their panties in a wad when they were compared to AIG execs and we decided to sacrifice journalistic integrity for corporate reach arounds. We hired him for his opinions (ASP Power Ratings) but couldn’t handle it when those opinions stood to lighten our pocketbooks and damage our cash flow. We now hate Lewis Samuels for betraying us and hope that he never works in the surf writing industry again.  We also hope his a$$hole catches on fire!

Is it making more sense now? The reality is the relationship between employer and employee will always be a tumultuous one. What makes Surfline our Teabag of the week front runner is their pathetic attempt to not only smear the name of a writer who made some excellent contributions to their site over the last couple years, but the fact that of all people they have the sack to call out their own former Op-Ed writer for exhibiting journalistic ‘Liberties’ while writing opinions for his own site!!  Apparently in the surf industry there is no room for difference of opinions, especially if those opinions are well articulated and offensive to the corporate behemoths that fund us like the table scrap pilfering grab-asses that we are.  My only hope is that more people will see Surfline for what they are and stop pandering to their standard of mediocrity.  Open up Surfline I’ve got three S’s for you.  Soft, salty and hopefully sandy….